"How To Get Rid of Your Stale Relationship Once and ForAll!" By Cucan Pemo
Is your relationship or marriage going downhill?
When you discover that your relationship has become staleand you always find it boring to even hang out with the loveof your life, it is a sure sign that you need to dosomething about your relationship. Do not be depressed aboutyour relationship circumstances or marriage situation. Tryapply the following strategies to rekindle the passion inthe relationship. These strategies can be so powerful andquick-acting that you would be amazed at the sudden, happyresults they unfailingly bring to your love problems.
1) There are couples who have reached the stage of "even ifthere is no communication, but we have reached a stage ofmutual understanding and appreciation of each other'spresence". Be aware! This does not guarantee that yourrelationship or marriage would be long lasting! Many of myreaders have had such experiences. All along they have beenthinking that their relationship life is so smooth going andobstacles-free, and when one day their lover come up to themand tell them they want to leave the relationship, they gotthe big shock of their life . Your relationship needs to beattended to every now and then, no matter how easy going andbrilliant everything seems to be at the moment.
As we surf through life, we are going to learn the lessonslife is going to throw at each and every one of us,including yourself and your partner. No one can guaranteethat the thoughts that you are holding dear and true toyourself (or even to your partner), will be the same thenext day. This is how we will grow, develop and improve. Itis normal that you have disagreements with each other oncein a while. In fact, it is healthy; and it can help you todevelop more understanding towards your partner. If you areconstantly having negative feelings about yourself, yourpartner or even your own relationship circumstance. Rememberthis fact, which has often been overlooked. Negative andunhappy feelings are caused by us, not by exteriorhappenings. Your life circumstance and events present thechallenge, but it is YOU who react to it. What you need todo is to work on the ways you handle things and take things,NOT to the things themselves.
2) In order to rekindle the passion and harmony in yourrelationship, returning it to the way it once is, you haveto learn how to regain your natural and spontaneous feelingfor life. Break focus. Concentrate not on your relationshipor marriage problems, but on becoming the solution. Yoursolution is often not how HE/SHE has changed, will changeinto, or is going to change into. The solution is YOU. Ifyou are sad about your relationship, what most of you wouldnormally do is to immediately take yourself as the feeling(of sadness). You think you are this "feeling", which youare not. And you would find yourself tend to double themistake by telling yourself, "I am unhappy. I am sad." Themore you say it, the sadder you feel; the sadder you feel,the more you'll say it. There, you have a vicious cycle.
3) Recall when you go for your first date, you are bubblingwith excitement and much anticipation. I know how it feels.It happens to me. I love that feeling, of initially fallingin love. As you go for more dates, and you understand eachother more and more, your anxiety and doubts about therelationship will reside.
You want to see more of each other. You have a stronginterest in developing this relationship and love further.You do everything you can to nurture it, and make sure thatit grows. When you have finally succeeded in settling downwith the love of your life, your wish of wanting to keepnourishing and nurturing this relationship subside. When youare starting to have this type of feeling, you have to nottake things for granted. Taking your relationship forgranted is often a sure way of growing your relationshipproblems. Put some heart and thoughts about bringing someexcitement and life into your relationship.
Always bear in mind, there is never an end to how far andhow much you can grow and develop your love and relationshipfor each other.
4) Drop your unrealistic expectations of the other person.True Love is not craving or attachment. When there iscraving involved, it is not genuine love. It is a secretwish to flee from your unwanted self into the other person.I have readers who have such strong cravings for anotherperson that they suffer the torment of missing him/herwhenever they are not around. Why suffer? Try to understandthat this is all unrealistic imagination of the otherperson, whoever they are .
It is your egoistic mind painting a false image of him/her.He (Her) is attractive, very likely because they represent aneed in you which you may or may not be aware of - all thosegood qualities such as strength, perseverance,determination, truthfulness, loyalty, etc. But suchqualities are not a reality in the other person. You canview this person differently. Choose to view that person inthis way. You'll be surprised at the result you'll get, justlike myself. Whenever my partner is not behaving or reactingin the way I (secretly) want to see and feel, I just remindmyself that I can view this person differently. He (She) hasnot changed. I have.
5) Understand that there are different types ofrelationships existing in this world. Your love for eachother could be similar to that of mother-child, or it couldmirror that of a brother-sister relationship. Whatever itis, if one party is too protective of the other person, andthe other person is not reciprocating appropriately,pressure will start to occur; misunderstanding would ensue.Consciously work on the balance in your relationship. Ifyour mate has been loving to you, show your love or showyour appreciation for him/her. If your partner is busy, keepyourself busy.
When your relationship problems start to overwhelm you, slowdown, take a deep, deep pause. Tell yourself there isanother way to live. It does exist. Thought elusive, it isalways there. You can be happy and clam always. Welcome theobstacles and problems in your relationship life. They willeventually awaken you to the very life you seek.
The understanding of your sadness and unhappiness will leadyou onto the path to true awakening. You cannot become happyby changing your exterior happenings. It is true. You cannotimprove your handwriting just by changing a new pen. Whentrying to solve your relationship or love problems, chooseto react to every situations constructively. It is useful toremember this. Take note of it. I pin it in front of me sothat I will always be reminded of the truth, each andeveryday "You feel good not because your relationship lifeis right; but your relationship life is right because youfeel good!"
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